presence

A Gift have i
One i did not ask for
nor would wish on another.

one i carry with me
Every moment of every hour

it weighs at times as much as i
Since it is the Other Me.
few have seen.
it has pushed me, driven me, bullied me, threatened me

as teacher and taskmaster.
given patience, compassion, empathy, wisdom
Fear, failure, pain, panic, poise.
Pace

it has lifted me up
set me in a place of hermitage

i repose in silence and solitude
i worry and i think too much

Now in a quiet place
Where i know strict limits
of a strange and powerful bequest
i can feel barometer changes
as winds rise
i can feel the pain of others
who whisper through the wires.
i listen to unspoken ache
for the Gift has taught me all about hurt
the fight to stay alive.
when the cards have been cruelly dealt.

So when you call me and say
“it hurts here”
I am there.
I can read sadness in your text messages.
And change in voice tones
From anger to resolve.

i lean comfortably along the boundaries
of this Gift.
my excuses and my reasons.
where i hide from people, hiways,celebrations, holidays, memorials.

i have taken my enemy as
My Friend

My prison and my freedom.
clock and pillow.
My wearying rest.

My doing and my
Undoing

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