i shouldn’t but I do

Just about all the time.
I’m as nervous as a cat
In a room full of
Pine rockers aflame.

It shouldn’t 

but the mountain fires

make me even more edgy.
I don’t want
To write about fires.
I don’t want
To see new plumes
Rising from the
South or West.
I don’t want to
Turn on the police scanner.
Or check the news.
Or hear the sirens on
The highway.
I don’t want to hear Al Gore’s
Truths in my head.

But I do.
And I do.

I want to stop thinking
About the number of 105 degree
Days remaining in
A summer none of us
Can see our way through.
For the thick ash and smoke.
Like a slow volcanic eruption.

I can’t.

I close my eyes
When I drive over the
Platte river.
I don’t want to see
It drying to sand.

the sun fades to orange

at 5 pm.
My eyes burn.

Seems to be a trend.
The forests and prairie
Ignite at the sneeze of  bumblebee.

if bumblebees sneeze.

I went to college.
Lots of college.
I took every class ever
Offered.

 intellectually, I Know

The forests and grasslands must burn.
It is Nature’s Way.
we have grown too large

we are in Her Way.

We are miserable stewards
Of our gift of Eden.

Now we are east of there.

 the endless Chinook south wind
Smells of burnt hay, pine, yucca, sagebrush.

I close my eyes.
But I can still see.
I can still smell.
I can feel the falling
Falling
Ashembers

14 comments

  1. Wow!!t This is so true. We don’t want to listen or see anymore but we are glued to the TV. And it only gets worse!!!! JW

    1. We Coloradoans are not often victims of massive disasters creeping in on all sides. Reminds me of a tv episode of Little House on the Prairie minus the tv of course: Massive Wildfires strike during Drought and Beetles epidemic. I remember a chapter from one of Ingalls books called Wheels of Fire in which tumbleweeds on fire spun thru the winds setting whole states ablaze. History repeats itself.

  2. ahh it is so. the smoke is a bummer.. it keeps me forever indoors, the heat at 105 does keep me indoors. your words ring so true. one of the last convos with my dad. “Karen i wont live long enough to see this state burn up. You wil!” that conversation 3 years ago. peace your way

    1. I believe last year about this time I wrote Sunblizzard. There’s no difference between this and a snowstorm. We are a bit paralyzed or maybe hypnotized by the weird eclipsed orangeish sunsky.

    1. I wonder how much of that awful smoke is burned trash thrown out by passing cars. This certainly can be no help to have extra manmade kindling when fires are such a risk.

    1. Why is that? Did we not include this as part of our curriculum to today’s generations. How hard it is to learn such inevitables without the convenience of a textbook.

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